My mind has been on all that God has brought us to and through over the past several years. If you would have told me in 2020 that I would have left a 14 year career to chase babies and Jesus more, I would have told you that you were crazy. God made my path so clear and my next step so possible, because it was a step of faith. Total obedience to what I knew God was calling me to do.
It made absolutely no sense to the world and really some days I stop and try to make sense of it myself and can’t. I guess that’s where as God’s children we can get hung up. We want to know the ”why and how” behind everything He commands us to do when sometimes His answer is simply “who”…. Who do you serve? God or self?
But what do you do when you’ve been obedient and still struggle?
The reason leaving made absolutely no sense is because not only was my husband jobless, but it would call me to be jobless to. I remember telling Jordan what the Lord made so clear to me and he was on board after a few months of me working in sheer misery. The thing I used to LOVE to do now was a chore and a task that took everything I had to work at. Why? How? It come to me so naturally before.
So there I was with no job and just full dependence that God would provide. Guess what?!? He did! At 3 am He woke me up with the idea to start a virtual assistant and coaching business and I ran to the roar! I ran TO the thing I was afraid of! Would I fail? Would I fall flat on my face? It didn’t matter. I was just to take the next step in obedience.
Living in the Overflow
When I tell you God blessed that business, He blessed it abundantly beyond what I could ever imagine. I was making more 24 hours later than I was in my former business. I found joy in creating and serving others. I absolutely love to serve and if you ever find me depleted of all energy and self, it’s probably because I threw myself into service for others. Helping others is my sweet spot and a gift the Lord gave me. I love to serve. I found joy unspeakable in it for a season.
It was a fun little gig and I still enjoy creating content and being a business coach to those that need my services but don‘t put myself out there much because God called me away from that too. Again, just true obedience!
The symptoms of a struggling soul…
I found myself completely miserable again though because God was calling me to walk away in total faith but I wasn’t ready to surrender! I just spent the past year building my brand and really putting myself out there. How do you just stop? Well friend, I wish I could tell you I knew the answer but I don’t. I was so miserable from lack of obedience that I remember telling my sweet friend Brittney I just couldn’t do it anymore. I didn’t know how much longer I could take living the way we were.
Faith has always came through our finances in the history of being married to Jordan. Anytime there was a struggle financially, I learned over time to stop and ask why we were where we were. I knew our faith was being tested and God proved himself faithful time and time again through that testing. This wasn’t our first rodeo with testing our faith through finances and it won’t be our last, but I can promise you friend, He is faithful to see you through.
Where do I go from here?
You may find yourself in the same boat! You’re at a crossroads in life and walking in total obedience to what God has called you to is very scary. You like certainty (don’t we all) and you like knowing you are the captain of the ship. You like the little bit of control you feel like you have over your future, your finances and your faith. That’s not faith though friend. Faith is trusting in the unseen hand of God providing beyond what you could ever provide for yourself.
So if you’re standing at a crossroads and you’re not sure which way to go, lean in! Lean into the Father! His hands are always open to His children! He is always ready for your faith walk to be strengthened. If you’re worried that He can, just know that He will. He takes care of His own. He is the Good Shepherd. We are just dumb sheep thinking we know the way.
I pray for you today friend! I pray His rod and staff will comfort you! That He will reel you in and save you from yourself. I pray that He gives you the next best step of obedience that you need to walk in. I pray that He makes you miserable (what?) until you fully surrender to what He has called you to do. I want nothing more and nothing less than God’s absolute best for you.
It’s time to get out of the shallow end of living and launch out into the deep just like Jesus told his disciples to do. It’s in the deep end where you’re faith is tested and where you are refined through fire! I pray today that through that refinement process you come out as PURE GOLD in the hands of a merciful Savior that loves you enough to save you from yourself and what you “think” is best for you. There is a KNOWING when you’re walking in submission to the will of God.
Can I pray with you?
Heavenly Father,
I don’t know who is reading this blog entry but you laid this topic heavy on my heart which tells me someone needs it. Lord, I pray for my friend that is reading this. I pray that you give them bold faith to walk in obedience and according to what you are calling them to do. Lord we are just dumb sheep that think we have it all figured out when we don’t. We truly know nothing and what we think we know is only knowledge that we have been given through You. We are in full dependence on you Father. I am asking boldly and courageously on my sister/brother’s behalf that you will make your will so REAL to them that there is no questioning it! That you will meet them where they are Lord and give them the next best step to take in true faith and obedience to what you are calling them to. Lord I pray you make them miserable until they fully submit to your will and your way. I pray they no longer find joy in the things you are trying to move them away from. I pray that through this time their faith will be tested and they will come forth as pure gold. Strengthen them by the power of your mighty hand! Help them Lord to STAND on the promises of your word and not waver in submission to your will. Make yourself so real to them Lord! Show up and show out on their behalf! Keep your word Father and show them your faithfulness. It’s in the name of Jesus Christ I pray, Amen!
There is freedom in surrender 💕